What is a sex wizardry actually? Lets dispel the mystique, because the truth is, anyone can be a sex wizard; that's the whole point of naming it, of putting it on a shirt or a phone case. Shit the world doesn't need more plastic; but it sure does need souls woken to the magic that is accessible to every one of us. Anyone can be a sex wizard if they want to be, but most people aren't.
Instinctively we know we're sitting on something fascinating. We have the craving, the interest, the curiosity. As adolescents we are so very curious about sexuality. Its really damn exciting. However we pick up even earlier in our lives that our genitals are our “privates”, that we shouldn't talk about them or touch them without washing our hands. We should only let select people see them, and they are very much compartmentalized from the rest of us. We must not let them see the light of day.
Sex wizardry is not so different from tantra; its many of the same concepts. However, Tantra is often described in heterocentric, cis gendered terms. Sex wizardry goes far beyond that. Sex wizardry recognizes a vast spectrum of expression. Sex wizardry is about merging that duality within. Sex wizardry is not constrained by a binary, of sex or gender; it's about your own inner alchemy and autoeroticism. Of course you may wish to engage with another person and utilize that wizardry for sexual interaction with another; but the foundation is embodiment, and ones relationship with themselves.
Sex wizardry is free of dogma. There are no wrong ways to do it. Its all about self discovery and inner listening. Its all about seducing and being seduced by your inner being. Its about allowing your inner child to be sexual. As you can imagine, this is the frontier of what the mainstream world can wrap its head around. In a world where gayness is not universally excepted, transgendered people are murdered and naked bodies are censored and criminalized, sex wizardry will not be something that you hear about in most circles. But in truth sex wizardry has been around for as long as sex has; however in that time its evolved a lot, especially recently.
Genitals are the primary magical tools of the sex wizard. The body as a whole in truth is the magical tool; the vessel of the spirit. Sex is the external manifestation, and sexuality the felt sense; the magic is in the reuniting, the healing. The whole body has yin and yang, but its all relative; theres no black or white.
The whole body can feel pleasure, and any point be a point of entry for eros, for sexual liminosity. The genitals are especially powerful tools for this state change, this expansion and plane shifting.
During arousal, the penis becomes a gravitational focal point for consciousness. The vivid powerful sensation that occurs from genital stimulation, focuses the consciousness and energy, just like a laser. Our normally sleepy, diffuse awareness, comes fully into the exquisite present. This builds and is amplified if we are skilled with energy cultivation, and mindful focus of our awareness.
Directing that energy at pornography is wasteful. Directing that energy at another human can feel very good for them, and sometimes they will return it to us, creating a circulation; but we have to be able to tap in and turn on our flow for ourselves first. The energy that we cultivate is what we have to give to everything, our creative projects, our own consciousness, and our own healing. That's why a foundational sex wizard practice is self cultivation; also known as mindful masturbation. Sex wizardry is about self care.
An integral part of sex wizardry is about feeling whole, feeling like we can own our experience of our genitals as part of our being, including the good feelings they give us. Part of the good feelings they give us is an altered state of consciousness. This really is the magic part. Sexual arousal is a vast territory; its a doorway opening inward.
And its not just our genitals that are the sexual part of us. Our body really is so very interconnected, just like all of nature. But there are certain access points for certain stimuli, like a button or switch. There are specialized areas we can stimulate to produce certain effects. This is the method where we take more responsibility for what our body is doing. Instead of a haphazard approach where we dont feel like we have much say in our feeling states, learning about, and engaging more with our own intimate systems, provides a real sense of empowerment, and gratitude for the gift of having a body.
Our genitals are a key that opens a door into an interior world. If we stay detached, robotic, thinking sex is only genital pleasure, then were not venturing very far into that interior landscape. Tuning inward and utilizing conscious control of our bodies, is a kind of inner alchemy.
The cock, dick, penis is a multi function organ. Its a wand, its a magical instrument; celebrated in mystical traditions for millennia. Some people even suggest that the reason our culture is dick phobic is because we have been conditioned away from accessing this key, this power that can free us from enslavement. Its been weaponized against us. When the nature based religions were paved over, so was the healthy expression of masculine sexual energy. Many ancient cultures worshipped phallus's. They saw them as living symbols of divine power.
Sex can be a double edged sword; and currently the primary edge that is functioning is the negative one, the one used to sell you things in a covert way. The edge that drains your life force. The edge that numbs your mind. See magic requires discipline and clear intention. It requires responsible use of the power otherwise it becomes destructive.
And sexuality is what you do with your sexual energy. Sex is a magic spell that can be used to harm or heal. With such tremendous power, I believe that we need to bring this esoteric subject out into the light of day; to collectively shine light onto our genitals and dispel the darkness and shame from them; so that we can use them in the service of love, and harmony.
Elevating our sexuality from a compulsive, unconscious, addictive place, to a mindful, sacred, spiritual place is the realm of sex wizardry, sexual empowerment, sexual enlightenment.
Sex wizardry will probably always be the territory of the edge walkers. Its the natural skill set of the shamans and mystics. However, the muggles (Hairy potter term for “regular” people) can benefit tremendously by learning from these edge walkers, from taking part in their classes, their therapies and their knowledge. Perhaps as the world learns to value differences, and to face their own demons; more recognition and reverence for the sex wizards of the world will allow them to do their work, and facilitate a collective healing for the whole world. Its what were here for.